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+\title{Urgent Newsflash: Origins of \LaTeX}
+\author{anonymous}
+\begin{Article}
+\frenchspacing
+U.S. Government Department of Defense papers released yesterday reveal
+the true source of the \LaTeX\ document preparation tool. Under the
+twenty-five year rule, hitherto secret Military Intelligence papers have
+been released into the public domain, detailing the Government
+involvement in the development of a prototype software tool.
+
+Major General Charles Schultz publicly apologised at a press meeting
+held to diffuse what was described as a `tense situation' as the
+unsavoury origins of the `alleged software' were finally unearthed.
+Developed at the height of the Cold War, the prototype system was aimed
+at crippling the so-called `information net' within the Soviet high
+command. Maj. Gen. Schultz said, `We realised what would happen if an
+enemy organisation actually tried to create documents with this thing.
+Of course, it seems cold-blooded now, but you have to remember that this
+was at a time of war.' He added, `We never expected it to get out into
+general circulation'.
+
+Apparently, the software was released into a controlled environment
+under the cover of a beta-test at several academic sites in Europe and
+America. `We put in place all safety measures. However, we didn't fully
+appreciate the tenacity of academic staff in using and then illegally
+copying it into the wider environment. With hindsight, we should have
+taken a warning from the fact that they still thought Fortran was a good
+idea.'
+
+DoD boffins are rumoured to have panicked and released a beta-version of
+Emacs, the strangely popular editor-cum-operating-system in order to
+stem the spread of \LaTeX. However, Maj. Gen. Schultz declined to
+comment.
+
+\end{Article}